I'm a happily divorced, single mom of 2 girls. I have a 16-year-old that thinks she's an adult and a 14-year-old that thinks she's 16. I'm currently unemployed and awaiting a decision for social security disability determination for my back.
Life isn't always all rainbows and sunshine, but it isn't always clouds and nightmares either.
I am a domestic abuse survivor. I've been abused in some way or form for most of my life; verbal, emotional, mental, and yes, some physical. My self-esteem has taken a major hit. Some days I'm not even sure if I have any...BUT I use what little bit I have to advocate for others.
I'm learning to tell my story. By staying silent, my abusers win. I cannot stay silent.
I love to write. Writing helps me deal with all the negative emotions I feel. I used to try to bottle it all in but I finally exploded. It did not end well. I was a cutter for a small amount of time and then I found that hitting myself worked better at relieving my pain. I would hit myself as hard as I could with any hard object I could find; large books, shoes, heavy family size, metal aerosol cans...I hit myself so hard in the head once that I couldn't see anything. EVERYTHING went black. I sat there for at least a minute or more afraid that I had caused myself to go blind. My sight came back. I was so afraid that I didn't hit myself again for several weeks. And then I started back up again: in the legs. My thighs became my favorite place to hit. I haven't done that in more than 15 years. I don't remember why I stopped but I'm glad I did. I think it was because I learned to channel it all into writing. I write poems, most of my poems tend to go towards the dark side...this is me trying to get all the negative out.
I am writing a novel (not sure if it will ever be finished) and I wrote a children's book...it's on Amazon and the link is listed under the links section! I love to read just as much or more than I love to write...it's a big part of why I may never finish my novel, I'm too busy ready other people's works...
Join me in weathering this new chapter of life, I'll post things I've learned, and might even ask for your advice...
Life isn't always all rainbows and sunshine, but it isn't always clouds and nightmares either.
I am a domestic abuse survivor. I've been abused in some way or form for most of my life; verbal, emotional, mental, and yes, some physical. My self-esteem has taken a major hit. Some days I'm not even sure if I have any...BUT I use what little bit I have to advocate for others.
I'm learning to tell my story. By staying silent, my abusers win. I cannot stay silent.
I love to write. Writing helps me deal with all the negative emotions I feel. I used to try to bottle it all in but I finally exploded. It did not end well. I was a cutter for a small amount of time and then I found that hitting myself worked better at relieving my pain. I would hit myself as hard as I could with any hard object I could find; large books, shoes, heavy family size, metal aerosol cans...I hit myself so hard in the head once that I couldn't see anything. EVERYTHING went black. I sat there for at least a minute or more afraid that I had caused myself to go blind. My sight came back. I was so afraid that I didn't hit myself again for several weeks. And then I started back up again: in the legs. My thighs became my favorite place to hit. I haven't done that in more than 15 years. I don't remember why I stopped but I'm glad I did. I think it was because I learned to channel it all into writing. I write poems, most of my poems tend to go towards the dark side...this is me trying to get all the negative out.
I am writing a novel (not sure if it will ever be finished) and I wrote a children's book...it's on Amazon and the link is listed under the links section! I love to read just as much or more than I love to write...it's a big part of why I may never finish my novel, I'm too busy ready other people's works...
Join me in weathering this new chapter of life, I'll post things I've learned, and might even ask for your advice...