The Chaos that is Me

As I said on monday, I want to get into the habit of writing at least a little bit each day. I spend too much time on mindless activities (like doomscrolling on social media platforms) and not enough time actually using my mind. I'm trying to get out of that habit...  With that in mind I've set a timer today for 20 minutes just for writing. I don't really have anything in particular I want to speak about, so this I guess is just me doing stream of consciousness writing again. But that's better than nothing, right? It's using my mind to think...  What should I write about? I'm not sure. I love the sound that birds make in the afternoon but I hate it in the morning. I love a gentle breeze with the sun shining down, but I hate a windstorm. I don't mind a gentle rain but I hate a thunderstorm. My favorite colors are green and purple but I also really like orange so I'm starting to wonder if maybe that's a favorite color, too?  I suffer from depression. A...

 This is my stream of consciousness writing for the day so I can at least say I wrote something today. I hate Mondays! There's always too much to do and not enough time to do it. People are always messaging me asking questions and I can't ignore them because they are relying on me to be there for them but then I'm not able to be there for myself and get my required work done. My boss says I need to work on my time management skills but all the time management skills in the world can't help me if I have too much to do and not enough time to do it in during the day. Everything has to be done before the end of the shift so how do I chose? I don't know. My head hurts, I'm stressed and overwhelmed and I just want to cry and give up and I can't. Some days I just want to quit...but I actually really like my job; I just hate Mondays!  I need a vacation but I can't afford to take time off. I need me time. I need to put me first but I can't. I hate life someti...